Autism Cuppa

Don’t Hate Me!

Now, hold on……what I am going to say may cause you to hate me. And truly, you may think I am bragging, but I swear I’m not.  And you may THINK this is a great thing but……well, alright, I’ll just say it…….I have a CLEANING LADY!  Whew, glad I got that out.

Now the reason I have a Cleaning Lady may cause the romantics out there to tear up a bit and trust me, it is romantic in a way, but actually having someone come in and clean the house in a household with an autistic adult family member ain’t no great thing!

Hubby and I have been together for 37 years and married for 36. For our 25th wedding anniversary, we decided to have a huge party at our house (really, in the back yard) because the following week we were hosting my parent’s 50th wedding anniversary party at their favorite restaurant. Each couple wanted their own celebration, so we agreed and sorted this out a YEAR before, with dates and venues chosen.  The invitations were sent out and……I FREAKED!  And the reason I freaked out was because my house… WHOLE house…..was never all clean at the same time. As I tried to calm my mind down long enough to decide where to start cleaning (and to get Kiddo out of the house long enough so I could do it), Hubby asked me what I wanted for an anniversary present.  I said flippantly, ” I want to have someone come in and clean the damn house,” so he arranged for us to have a cleaning lady come in every four weeks….and she and her crew are STILL coming! Told ya it was romantic 🙂

But it isn’t that great, folks, because I can’t *just* relax and have her come in.  My Kiddo hates change.  Usually, our schedules are such The Kiddo is not at the day program when they come so I have to strip his bed with the bedroom door closed and sneak his clean sheets out of the linen closet…I feel like I’m doing something scandalous!  When we first had Juana come, we would prep the Kiddo by telling him Juana and the girls were coming and bribe him  with chicken nuggets from Wendy’s (those are the big guns, folks).  We told him he needed to be good so he could have Wendy’s after they left. And 50% of the time he was the smiling, perfect gentleman and 50% of the time, he was a jerk!  One month, I forgot to do my cleaning lady Social Story with him and….he was perfect!  I started NOT doing the prep work with him and he did better than fine…..we wonder if knowing they were coming was worse than just having them come…..maybe the anticipation of change was more difficult than the actual change.

In any event, there are some months I think the whole thing isn’t worth it but….I like a clean house.  So does The Kiddo.  And isn’t a cleaning lady better than a pair of silver candle sticks for your 25th anniversary?


Published by


Your Autism Cuppa is written by a longtime Autism Mom. A former Autism Society of America local chapter president, she is an educator and artist and has done inclusion consulting work for over 20 years. Married for 36 years to the father of her Three Sons, the eldest having autism, she wants young parents to know they are not alone. Life can be fun!

6 thoughts on “Don’t Hate Me!”

  1. Totally jealous! I only just said the other day that I need someone to come in and do some heavy cleaning. We were wanting to have a birthday party for our ASD son but then I freaked out at the thought of the state of our house and decided there’s no way I can do that!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Totally understandable! But one of these days JUST DO IT! It’s worth the money–if you can afford it–and the hassle. Kiddo hates having the Girls here but loves the house being clean…don’t know if he realizes someone makes the house clean and it doesn’t just magically happen. My NT sons (both moved back home in May)complain about their crap being moved but that’s too bad for them!

      Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s